Terminal 1 is home to thousands of football fans who are determined to drink their way through a seven-hour delay.

An inappropriate joke at check-in means Maria Demetriou has to call the police on suspicion of drug smuggling. John Cull's passengers and crew have to wait for glue to dry.

Maria Demetriou has hundreds of pilgrims to deal with, as well as foot-and-mouth regulations to enforce. Pop superstar Michael Jackson flies in and makes an undignified exit.