Your freshman yearbook picture might say "yes" but what does your bodyodyody say? Rock and Heidi are COMBING through the "facts" and asking the hard questions like: how did Jesus get those body waves? Is Boston a lake or a river? Can I have that wig? Now, they're not experts but they keep saying "trust me, trust me," so …

Your friend Jessica might be a sweaty drunk but is she just a sweaty woman who really likes pinot? Rock and Heidi are POURING out the "facts" and asking the tough questions like: can we put this round on Jaida's tab? Why is my cocktail not refreshing? What season was Glandular on? Now, they're not experts but they keep giving me shots, so…

But how did Old Aunt Edith learn how to order shrimp in Tagalog? Rock and Heidi are SCHOOLING us on the "facts" and asking the hard questions like: are three-legged dogs actually perverts? Do corgis have the original BBL? Are you old or dumb? Now, they're not experts but they keep handing out treats, so…